Learning to win and lose gracefully

There are many lessons we want to teach our children. One of the most important is how to deal gracefully with disappointment. On January 6, 2021, the losing candidate for the US presidency incited a riot against our nation’s Capital, nearly resulting in the death of his own vice president. Four years later, on January 6, 2025, the losing candidate certified the election results and gracefully handed over the office of the president to the new victor. As she put it, “the peaceful transfer of power is one of the most fundamental principles of American democracy. As much as any other principle, it is what distinguishes our system of government from monarchy or tyranny.” That is, there are bigger principles that transcend a single contest. Sports are a healthy way of teaching this lesson to our children. Great athletes know the discipline of getting up after a loss and again hitting the practice field and preparing for the next game. A single bad grade on an exam is sometimes the best incentive to study even harder and excel for the remainder of the course. The bigger principle, in these cases, is the joy of a game and the learning that comes in the classroom. Emotional maturity demands that we learn from our mistakes or our shortcomings and set about to correct them. Proverbs 14:25 says: “Souls are saved by truthful witness and betrayed by the spread of lies.” This proverb highlights the importance of integrity and truthfulness, even and especially in the face of defeat. A good “loser” would likely be honest about their mistakes and failures and, in turn, congratulate the “winner”. Let’s teach our children these lessons, starting at an early age, so that they may form good habits of winning and losing. – – – Fr. Jim